5 Months Together!

It's crazy how fast this transistion period is flying by.  I have so much to say about how far you guys have come this month, with your english, your bonding, your peace and comfort.  But, I'm just exhausted and it's stinking hot here in Texas.  I believe this monthly update is simply going to be about your gorgeous faces, and less words!

You guys have no fear, and no sense of which end is up when you're tumbling and having fun!

We really loved traveling to Houston for the Memorial Day Weekend.  You guys got to hang out with several of your buddies from the Transistion Home in Ethiopia, and I got a chance to chat the day away with my Yahoo Group Sisters!

My sweet fellow AWAA Mom Cindi Koceich with Selah Studios took these portraits of the kids and we love them so much.

"Mommy, Bekeh like Ethiopia better."

So, Bekeh you've really been missing your homeland a lot lately. Our trip to Houston was perfectly timed, thanks to the Holy Spirit.

Your friend from the Transistion Home in Ethiopia flew in from Ohio, and y'all got to spend the day together. You were thrilled to see Winnie, and we could tell it really helped you to have "part of Ethiopia" back in your life.

Look at how sweet you were playing "Coffee" in Ethiopia and now the smiles are just as big when you're together in Texas! Today was an especially good day. We laughed and giggled a lot. "This is awesome!" came out of your mouth over and over. After awhile I asked you, "Do you like being at Mommy's house?" You looked at me for awhile and softly said, "No. I like Askalech's house." I understand sweet Bekeh. All the food, love, and security in the world doesn't take away the hurt of leaving your family and your sister behind. Mommy said, "I'm sorry you cannot see Askalech, I know you miss her." You said, "Mommy, Bekeh like Ethiopia better." And I gave you a big hug.

So, then I asked you, "Do you like Mommy?" And you smirked and said, "NO!" "NO? What can Mommy do better?" I asked with a smile. You giggled and said, "Mommy play kitchen in my room." "Oh! I see. . ." And off we went to bake plastic veggies. . .

4 Months Together!

Do you know how I know things are settling into a little bit of normal around here? It's difficult for me to sit and think about what you two have done in the past month with us. For the first time since January, the family has not solely revolved around the two of you. I know that in and of itself might sound offensive to you guys, but I assure you it's the best thing for you. You have joined our family, and you are finally becoming part of our family, not this separate entity that sends out amazing and beautiful light and energy but also creates a gravitational pull that yanks everything around into it!

Caleb, I've been anxiously waiting to write this post for one reason, to announce to the world that you no longer use me as a battering ram. Wow, where did that word come from? I was thinking punching bag and battering ram came out of my keyboard. That just started a whole thing with the Holy Spirit in me. Whoa.

Siege armies used a battering ram to break down a gatehouse door or even smash a castle wall. To shield themselves from attack, they built a covered shed, in which they hung a thick tree trunk on chains suspended from a beam above. Carpenters tapered the trunk into a blunt point and capped it with iron. Soldiers swung the hanging trunk back and forth, and the forward end of the trunk moved in and out of the shed like a tortoise's head, battering its target. Castle defenders tried to burn the shed down with flaming arrows, though attackers responded by covering the shed with animal pelts or earth to make it fireproof.

I was never your battering ram Caleb, mommy had it all wrong. Jesus was your battering ram. He was the large tree breaking down the walls you built around your heart. I was simply part of the covering shed. I took the fiery arrows from the enemy trying to stop us from breaking down the strongholds. You weren't firing the arrows sweetheart, you were the prisoner locked inside we were trying to rescue. It wasn't until we covered ourselves in the blood of Jesus that we became fireproof and finally knocked through to where you were hiding. Oh praise your name Holy Spirit for showing me that just now. Thank you for being a battering ram for all of us, and forgive me for all those months I wasted feeling sorry for myself because I placed myself as that tree and whined about the beating I was taking against the castle wall. Thank you for tearing that wall down on April 24th and bringing Caleb out from his bondage.

Wow Son, didn't expect God to speak through my typing this blog post, but that's the cool thing about your Heavenly Daddy, He shows up everywhere. That just changed my perspective on everything in 5 minutes. Gotta take a break and process and pray, be right back.

Deep breath. Ok, Caleb, so, our bonding nightmare is behind both of us, and we're able to just move forward with normal bonding. It will take months and years and will never stop, but at least we're together finally. No more frantic screaming, no more avoiding eye contact, no more hiding under blankets. You still startle really easy, it will take time for you to trust and find peace, but we'll get there together. As you toddled around the house today playing and trying to talk in your undecipherable jibberish, I thought to myself, "I really do enjoy that boy." You are hilarious, you have a snorting laugh that cracks us up, you announce very loudly anytime anyone burps or toots in the house, and your cheeks are filling out with extra sweetness enough that the most adorable dimples have appeared! Just squeezable. I love your prayers. I love how you repeat "Caleb no tee tee on the floor, that's yucky. No tee tee in pants, yucky. No tee tee on Bekeh in bath, that's yucky." everytime you go potty. You don't have accidents, maybe because you remind yourself so often. . . You're talking a lot, although it takes one of us to interpret for you to outsiders. Still got a lazy tongue and lips, but we'll work on it! You love playing outside, you love playing pretend kitchen, and you still love WIGGLES!

Bekeh. Your biggest change this month has been in your peace. Although you still pout when you feel left out of anything, which is a lot, you are a more peaceful person. I think a lot has to do with the fact that you now have a voice and vocabulary to express your needs. The other day you came in to me after school and said, "Mommy, Bekeh no like this dress. No more wear it." You had whined everytime I put it on you previously and just got chidded for being whiney. It was good to express your taste, cause the dress went in the giveaway box, and you were very pleased. You have also learned the concept of money and buying. You received a birthday card from Great Grandma Mullen, and about thirty minutes after opening it you came to me and said, "Mommy, where my money from Grandma Mullen?" I laughed cause you were so serious and it was your longest thought and phrase to get out clearly up til then. So I said, "It's in your wallet." Immediatley you responded, "Where's my wallet?" So I showed you in the kitchen. The next day you saw a Wiggles coloring book at the store and begged for it. I said no, and you said in an excessively whiney voice, "Bekeh want it." So I said, "Do you want to buy it with your money in your wallet?" Your eyes lit up and we bought the coloring book and when we got home you counted out five dollars (it was a thick one) and gave it to me. You carried that book around everywhere and told everyone, "Bekeh bought it - money!" I love being able to talk with you now. It's still progressing, and you have to have insider knowledge to understand everything, but you've been telling me whose absent at school, whose parents visited the classroom, who got in trouble in class, what you did, where you want to go, what you think about things, etc. I can't wait to really learn about your personality more when you can express all those amazing things swimming around in your head!I love this picture because Brooklyn took it, and you'll smile differently for her, and because you're wearing a beloved article of clothing! Brooklyn, Emily, and Natalie all received these Hello Kitty nightgowns from Mimi manyyears ago when they were tiny. I think Brooklyn had just turned 3. When she got it, it came to her ankles, and she was still wearing it last month, only it barely covered her toosh. But she loved it and would never let it go. Finally, a couple of weeks ago, I convinced her it was time because it didn't have to go away, she could pass it down to you. It was actually a tough choice for her, but seeing you in it makes her smile, and me too! I love that you will wear it til it's bone thin and barely covers your hiney too.

I'll try and take notes during month five so I'll have more to report, but it was an AMAZING month and we've come so far in getting used to each other and figuring this whole new normal out! Love you babies! (Oh, sorry, you HATE it when I call you that. You don't understand the concept of nicknames or terms of endearment at all!!!) SO. . . .Love you big girl and big boy!

Bear's Coming Home!

We are so blessed to have a tight knit group of Ethiopian/Texan families that we share this journey with. Bekeh especially loves Ms. Linda, and thoroughly enjoys our car rides to lunch. She's been waiting for "her baby from Ethiopia" to come and play with her and we're thrilled to pieces he's on his way home this week!!!! He's gotten so big since we held him and kissed all over him for Ben and Linda in January. Can't wait to kiss all over him some more this weekend! He's coming Bekeh and you can play with him again finally! We love you Bereket!!

Let's Party!

On Saturday we had a wonderful birthday party out at my brother's place to celebrate Caleb, Bekeh, and Rhett's birthdays. They each came home to our families in January of this year after being adopted through America World, so this was their first American Birthday, and we went all out!It was a cool family affair, and the kids were happily overwhelmed with the attention, and especially the gifts.
Caleb's favorite gift was from Nana, a green ride on Dog. It was the first gift opened, and he sat upon it to open all the others! He and Papa must have ridden up and down the steep driveway a hundred times!Bekeh loved her kitchen from Nana, earrings from Grammy and Papa, and is having a blast with all the sidewalk chalk and puzzles she received. Thank you!
Every American child enjoys the thrill of devouring their very own birthday cake on their first birthday, and these three were no different. Although the majority of their smash cakes were destroyed in a mature manner with a fork, Bekeh and Caleb were forced by their brother and sister to partake with their full face as well!Their first real sugar highs!!!

The kids had a blast playing with their cousins. They played on the bounce house, the zip line, took rides on the atv cart, blew bubbles, rode bikes and scooters. . . by the time we left, everyone had black feet and required baths at 11:30 at night!

Happy Birthday beautiful babies! We were so thrilled to celebrate with you and watch you blossom with all the personalized attention! We love you Rhett! Love Ya Bekeh! Love and Kisses Caleb!

5, 5, Glorious 5!

Bekeh has been waiting for her birthday for two weeks now. Somehow, on Caleb's birthday back on the 22nd of April, she understood the concept and has been literally counting down the days. First it was, "Two weeks, Bekeh's birthday!" and then "Next week is my birthday!" And Monday it was, "Two days, my birthday!" and yesterday, "Wedsay my Birthday!"
Last night I asked her how old she was and she said, "Four!" and then I asked, "How old will you be tomorrow?" and she held up all five fingers and screamed, "FFFIIIIVVVEEE!!"
So in honor of her 5th birthday today, 05-05-05, here are 5 of our favorite things about Bekeh.
1. She loves Butterflies. When I pulled out the butterfly wings from our dress up box this morning, her eyes were bigger than saucers and she began jumping up and down! Her favorite new song to request is Miley Cyrus, Butterfly Fly Away. She will do all the motions for a caterpillar, and then makes a chrysalis with her hands and then when Miley sings Butterfly fly away, she flaps her hands like a butterfly. It's adorable.
2. She's a smiley, giggly, happy, joyful girl! Sunshine follows her around. She brightens the room she enters, and her love is contagious. 3. She loves school. 11:00 is one of mommy's favorite minutes of the day. Bekeh runs out the door from school with a look of pure excitement and joy to see me, runs to my arms, and can't get all the thoughts to form into words fast enough to tell me about her day and share her creations with me. She knew she was special today sitting in the teacher's chair and having her friends sing to her. She was proud to have mommy and Caleb there to watch her dance and sing with her classmates. I was proud too. 4. Her favorite color is Yellow. She'll choose it every time. Again, she's pure sunshine. When she was first learning her colors, everything was yellow. Now that she knows them, she'll answer me correctly, i.e. "That's red. And this is yellow." and she'll point out whatever she can find that's yellow.5. She's an absolute trickster. She loves hiding things and giggling like crazy when you notice they're gone. She points and says, "Spider!" and then laughs when you look. Today at lunch Daddy asked for a kiss and she refused him and pulled away over and over, one of her favorite games, until finally when he said he didn't want one, she says, "Kiss! Kiss Daddy!" But today, instead of just kissing him, right at the last second, she stuck the apple out of her mouth and poked him with it!At McDonald's which she picked for her Birthday lunch, she was a bit quiet when I served her nuggets to her, which are normally her favorite, so I asked her what was wrong. With a very sad tone she said, "I want cheeseburger like daddy." So Jason popped up and went and ordered her a cheeseburger. She looked at me bewildered, knowing that's never worked before, and I said, "It's your birthday, you get to choose everything you want!" She took that cheeseburger from daddy's hands like it was absolute gold. Every bite she would shake her head with excitement and say, "My birthday cheeseburger!" She's already announced we're eating Pizza for dinner. Her other favorite new food, and the other four are thrilled with her decision! We make birthday's super fun around here, and she's certainly caught on. She knows she's the princess today, and I hope she feels like that everyday, for the rest of her life.
Run toward Six Bekeh, with all your heart. This is going to be a year full of new discoveries and new love. Enjoy it as much as we enjoy you sweet cheeks. Happy Birthday, we love you!

Thanks for Voting for Bekeh!

THANK YOU! The voting has ended but our appreciation for all the support we received goes on and on. We can't express the love we felt from the thousands of votes, emails, and posts we received encouraging us about Bekeh and our adoption because of the shameless requests we put out there over and over. Adoption is a revolution God is stirring in people's hearts across the world, and we thank Him for allowing us to be ambassadors on this mission in whatever form He'll use us for His glory and for His children. God Bless you all.

Editor's Note: Bekeh ended in place 22 which is a beautiful number between the Lord and I. He speaks, I listen!

Texas Beauties

We had a wonderful photo session with my good friend Emily in the bluebonnets last week, but Bekeh loves the flowers so much she begs to stop everytime we see a patch of them on the side of the highway. Yesterday, realizing they'll be gone soon, I decided to give her her wish and dressed them back in denim and stopped at the prettiest ones I saw between here and Flower Mound. It was fun just to let them run and play and capture the shots freely. They had so much fun. Hope you enjoy too.

Bekeh's Song

Bekeh loves to sing, and she sings everything she thinks. Here is one of my favorite songs she sings all the time, it simply has to make you giggle.

I warned you before that she doesn't pronounce her "Ch" or "k" sounds. "Ch" comes out "sh" and "K" comes out "T," so when you're talking about Chicken, which she does ALL THE TIME, it can leave you blushing.

Imagine my shock when very loudly from the back seat out of nowhere I hear, "Mimi, Sh**Head! Silly Nathan." and the above song began, and continued for 15 minutes.

This will be a perfect intro to her Senior Year memory video someday!

3 Months Together

Once again I'm amazed at how quickly this month with you two has flown by. This has certainly been a month of turning points. You've been in our arms for 1/4 of the year. 25% of 2010, you've spent as Crazy Roots. I can see clear lines in the sand where we've left certain things behind, and moved toward a more cohesive and stable family.

CALEB
Look at my proud big boy! No more baby! The Easter Bunny brought you Elmo underwear in your basket!! We began training the first thing Monday morning after Easter. On Monday you had 3 accidents, two immediately in the morning, and one late in the evening. On Tuesday you had one accident in the morning, and one late in the afternoon. And from Wednesday on, (two weeks now!) you've been a dry, going in the potty, underwear only, even at nap time and bedtime, wearing fool! You were even circumcised 8 days after beginning potty training and never missed a beat. You went immediately in the potty after surgery and didn't let your healing - or the gobs of petroleum jelly on your privates every time you go since -slow down your mission. You hated diapers and love your big boy pants and there has been no going backwards. We even got stuck in a really long car ride around town the other day, 4 hours, and you didn't have an accident. I am so proud of you Caleb!!!

You guys are so excited that Spring is here. You play outside non-stop. You even decided that being outside with hyper-Ella-the crazy dog was ok as long as your weren't indoors. It was time for 'Nathan's coming of age to learn how to mow the yard' last weekend and you were so intrigued with him pushing the mower that you insisted you and Daddy mow some too. You giggled the entire time, it was adorable.Caleb, you are talking up a storm. Your mouth is still a bit lazy, not bothering to form the sounds or finish your words all the time, but you are communicating everything you want, and understanding everything I need you to. Your favorite things in life are The Wiggles and swim goggles. You wear swim goggles everywhere. You even wore them to church last weekend, and your teacher said you never took them off. You're so adorable. You find pairs in the house I didn't even know we owned. It's hilarious. You look like a mad scientist, especially since they're usually paired with some piece of clothing you've swiped from your older siblings or daddy. We watch the same Wiggles movie every morning, per your insistence. You know every word, hand motion, exaggerated facial expression, and dance move. You and mommy have to do every single one, every single day. It is a good workout for me, and I love the bonding time with you, but I can't wait for you to agree to at least a different Wiggles video someday. . . I know all those by heart too thanks to your two brother's former obsession.

So, speaking of bonding, how's it going??, we're always asked. . . getting better and still not there yet. I feel like we belong in a Kenny Rogers song. But instead of Daytime Friends and Night time Lovers, I am your Weekday Pal and Weekend Poison. During the week I'm not allowed out of your sight, you have to be able to reach out and touch me at all times, we laugh, we giggle, we play games, I hold you, you cuddle up to me, you give me more kisses than I think I can handle, you hug constantly and don't even prefer daddy over me at lunchtime or the evenings, and you'll pass easily back and forth between us. You'll look me in the eye for extended periods of time and respond "I love you too Mommy" when I say "I love you Caleb" a thousand times a day. And that lasts until about mid afternoon on Saturday, when you realize daddy has been around and not gone to work, and then we're done. You'll scream and thrash and push and kick for hours if I hold you. When I call your name you vehemently say, "No!" and crank your head as far away from eye contact with me as possible. I'll say "I love you Caleb," and you'll say "No love mommy. No mommy. No." Attempts to play, sing, watch Wiggles, dance with you are met with louder more desperate rages of crying. Your crying can begin and last for 90 minutes or more. This continues through Sunday night, and then on Monday morning, you happily wave to everyone as they leave out the door, and when the last carpool has pulled out and it's just the two of us, you hold your arms up to me to be held and say, "Wiggles!" And as if Wally or Greg's magic wand has been waived, you're my friend again.

But, nonetheless, we're moving in the right direction. Those weekdays are wonderful, and in them you're learning I can be trusted, that I love you, that I'm not going anywhere, and that you really do love me too. It used to change every night when dad came home from work, and now it's just on the weekends. Soon, it might last until Sunday morning, and then maybe Sunday night, and then some glorious day, you might decide it's not necessary at all and you'll realize that the bond you so desperately need with a momma in your life is exactly what you have. Until then, we'll keep working harder than you thrash and praying louder than you cry, knowing that day is coming and Jesus is bringing it to us.

Bekeh
My big-eyed beautiful daughter, you've been busy this past month. Starting a few weeks after you got home, we were really having a serious problem with you having small qty wetting accidents throughout the day. You were so busy exploring all the new things around you that you wouldn't stop and go potty. I tried all my tricks and nothing was working. Turns out I just didn't know your currency. It was earrings. You wanted earrings so desperately. You would stroke mine and say "Bekeh earrings." You would walk up to me all day long holding your earlobes and just whine and grunt in dissatisfaction. I told you earrings would hurt and I would squeeze your earlobes and say "owies." and you would shake your head and say, "No, owies. Bekeh earrings." And then the moment of pure genius! I told you Babies don't have earrings, only big girls, and to be a big girl you couldn't have any shint in your panties. We made a big deal of saying three days, three night nights with no shint in panties and then Bekeh's earrings. You understood and everytime you would go potty you would look at your panties and exclaim very loudly, "Mommy!!!! No SHINT IN PANTIES! Bekeh no shint!!" You were so proud of yourself. And you would then grab your ear lobes and just nod your head at me with a quirky smile. And then it was time. We went to Southlake Town Square and I kept telling you, "Earrings are going to be owies." But you didn't care. You picked out your pair, just like Brooklyn's of course, and sat waiting. You were disappointed when you realized what we kept staring at so intently at first was only purple marker dots on your lobes. You thought we were trying to trick you and you got mad. But then the gun came out and I looked at you seriously and said, "O.K. this is the owies. Be still." She clicked that gun, and you didn't even move, blink, or flinch. I thought I was dreaming. Nathan had hidden himself on the sidewalk because he said he couldn't bear to listen to you cry. So sweet. She moved positions and clicked that earring through your second ear, and again, we were all waiting for you to cry, and nothing! You just said, "Earrings?" and I nodded and you said, with pure amazement in your voice, "No owies!" When I showed you yourself in the mirror, you would have thought they had placed the Miss America crown on your head. You were gushing over yourself. And we were gushing over you too. So brave, and so proud, you tell EVERYONE about your earrings. No one comes within 10 feet without you pointing them out. And it's been almost a month, and still no shint in your panties!!!


You have been learning so much English it's mind-boggling. You have picked up personal pronouns, "My shirt. My turn." etc instead of always, "Bekeh's turn, or Bekeh's shoes." Every time you connect a new phrase it makes me laugh, it's just so cute coming out of your mouth with your lazy C sounds and missing Ch sounds. The other day you were working a puzzle with Corban and you said, "My turn Torban. You don't touch." If I had to write them all down I'd guess your vocabulary was into the multiple hundreds already. You've also begun to really slow down and work things out. You are learning how to cut with scissors like a pro, you can color and draw specific shapes and are beginning to figure out how to form your letters. You love watercoloring especially.
With your improving English skills you're also beginning to communicate your memories about life in Ethiopia. The other day you asked me, "Where's Askalech?" I said, "She's in Ethiopia." And you thought for a second and said, "Bekeh bye-bye, Caleb bye bye Ethiopia." I nodded my head and you thought some more and said, "Ababa no bye bye, Askalech no bye bye, Bekeh bye bye, Caleb bye bye." I nodded with each one, until this one, and then I cried. You thought for a bit more and got very quiet and said, "Bekeh bye bye, Caleb bye bye, Mommy bye bye." It was your first time to talk about your Ethiopian mother. I could tell you were continuing to think about her so I just held you and let you remember. After a few minutes you sat up and very excitedly help up two fingers and said, "Two mommies! One mommy, two mommies." The next day you told me how you and Askalech used to play, and you would jump and get water. Saturday you came into the office with me and asked to see a picture of Askalech on the computer, so I pulled them up. When we got to the picture of Me, Daddy, Brooklyn, and your Ababa and Askalech in front of your hut, you exclaimed, "Bekeh's house!" I started pointing to the people in the picture and asking who they were. You got very excited about two daddies again, and you said "Two mommy" and pointed to me. So I asked, "Where's One mommy?" You looked at the picture and got very solemn. Then slowly you pointed at the screen, and placed your finger over the door to your hut. Is she inside? I asked you. "Yes, she's tying." Why is she crying, I asked. You kept looking at the door and you said, "She's going night night, she's tying, mommy go bye bye." You didn't cry, you just slid off my lap and scurried off to play, but I sat here weeping for you. I'm sorry your "one mommy" went bye bye and you're not with her still. You've since talked about how she would feed you, play with you, and sing to you. I can't wait for you to learn more English so you can tell me more wonderful stories about your "One mommy." I want to help you remember her forever, and I want you to always know that God was sad when she died too. God wanted you to be with her all your life too, but we live in a world full of sickness and poverty. We are so loved and blessed that God redeemed you into our family. You are a sweet light in our hearts Bekelech and your "two mommy" loves you and cherishes you deeply.