Thank you Alldrin Family!

The Alldrin Family just returned from Ethiopia where they were united with their three newest children, and they also brought back new images of our kiddos!!!
Your kids are darling! Your little guy was very funny. They brought him over and I read the book to him. After I handed him the book, he decided that our appointment was over and took off down the step (which was bigger than he was) and across the alley to his nanny. Your little girl is oh, SO cute! She loved the pony. She was pretty serious until I started tickling her. That is when I got the big smiles. She is sweet! They are very small. I would put them at 18 months and 3 years old in size if I had to guess. I can't wait for you to go get them! -KristinIt's so wonderful to see them growing and their sweet curly hair growing in! We are so thankful for these peeks at them from our traveling friends so we don't feel like we're missing out on quite as much until we can go get them! 13 days and we leave! 21 days and they'll be in our arms!!!! Thank you Jesus!

God is perfect and all His ways are Perfect!

I've been so busy the last couple of days, but still in the back of my mind just a bit upset that we weren't on the other side of the world right now preparing to pick up Bekeh and Dereje. But, God in His amazing wonderful ways sent me an email through a travel buddy this morning that clarified so much. I understand a portion of His timing, I understand that it's not always all about me, shock!, and I understand that our Heavenly Daddy loves us so much He doesn't leave anything open. He completes and provides closure and healing to every part of our life when we let Him. Thank You Lord for your perfection. Thank you for YOUR WILL and your timing winning out over my short sided desires. I can't wait for all the blessings you have planned for this trip, and I can't wait to hold Bekelech and Dereje and love on them, and pray over them, and put lotion on their sweet hands, and moisturizer in their hair!!! AAHHHWWWW!!!!!!! I'm so excited!!!!!!!!

Travel Dates Confirmed

Our dates have been changed and set for January 9th - January 22nd. It will be a much greater challenge to find care for the boys, Brooklyn will miss finals, and two weeks of school instead of one, but God is sovereign, knows better than I, and His ways and timing are perfect. Bekeh and Caleb will not be affected any differently, I will have two extra weeks to prepare for their arrival, and I'm sure whatever God's reason for having us change and pay the fine for changing our tickets, is serious and important enough to not be questioned by me. We look forward to all the families we will travel with on the 15th, and simply can not wait to go bring home our children.

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps." Proverbs 16:9 Thank you Lord for allowing your Will to win over my earthly vision and desires.

They are CRAZY ROOTS!!!!!!!

AWAA has called, and we're thrilled to announce that Bekelech and Dereje are legally, officially, formally, and forever more. . . CRAZY ROOTS!!!!!!!!!


PRAISE THE LORD!! HE HAS BLESSED US SO ABUNDANTLY!!!!
Welcome to our family Bekelech Eva Root

and we will call you Bekeh - pronounced "Becca" . . . and Welcome Caleb Wesley Dereje Root

you're going to love it here!!! It's always a blast!!

We Did Not Pass

The guy who was signing off on our MOWA letter went out of town and took his keys to the files with him so no one else could access them. Hopefully the judge can squeeze us in on the 8th and we'll pass then.

BUT ON OTHER NEWS!!!!! AWAA CHINA called my brother and sister in law with their TA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We are rejoicing that the Lord answered our prayers and brought them this news today!!!!!!!!!! We are so excited to bring Rhett home finally!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We serve an awesome God who is in control of everything. Our adoption timing is perfect according to the Lord's will and this delay neither surprised Him or changed the timeline we've been on all along. We are heartbroken that it delays our travel though. We were hopeful Brooklyn wouldn't have to miss as much school if we could have traveled in the Jan 2 group, but again, God's timing, not ours, thankfully.

Waiting, waiting, waiting. . . .

Waiting for the phone to ring, everytime it does my heart goes crazy. Waiting for the time when it's AWAA. Waiting to honor God with my praises, waiting to see what the next leg of our journey looks like, and waiting for my nephew, just happily, anxiously, joyfully waiting. . .
"Be glad for all God is planning for you. Be patient in trouble, and always be prayerful." Romans 12:12 LB

PRAY PRAY PRAY!!!!

I've just felt the need to worship God all day. I feel like He's answered our prayers for success already, that MOWA has gotten our letter to the court, that their father is in Addis, and that it's going to be a day of great rejoicing tomorrow. Nonetheless, I will be continuing to fast until I receive word, and praying throughout the night for God to hold back any forces that stand against our victory and bringing home our children asap.
Here's the timeline as best I can tell.

Assuming court is in session between 8am and 4pm, and it's 1:00 in the morning now, then from 11:00pm tonight until 7:00am in the morning Central Standard time, we could be before the court with our proxy.

Our agency will call as soon as they can to let us know. I will then post as quickly as possible here on the blog to let you know the results. When we pass court, my post will include all the pictures we have of them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We're ready to watch you move God! Show your glory in Ethiopia!!!!

So Exciting!

My sweet friend in Ethiopia who is taking pics of the kids and showing them ours wrote on her blog today that she got pics and VIDEO of all the kids she was taking care packages for!! Can you believe we're going to get to see them moving?

We also got new updated photos today, and I made our slideshow montage with them included, all ready and waiting to post on Tuesday when we get word that we've passed court!

You won't believe the smiles!!!!!

Have a blessed Thanksgiving! The Roots most certainly are!!!!

Tonight they see our faces!!!

Tonight while we're sleeping, our sweet YG friends the Hutcheson's will be showng B and D our photos! I hope they see the love in our eyes, and feel our desire to come get them and bring them home into our family! I can't wait for Karen to send me photos, maybe even some video, and the tracings of their feet so I can get them some cute shoes!!!!!

Exactly one week from tonight, we go to court. We've been fasting and praying, and several friends have been fasting with us, in preparation for this night. It's bathed in prayer and I have no anxiety about it what so ever. God knows the outcome, and it's all in His perfect timing. I carry no burden for it! Pray with us that God's will be done, and we believe His will is for our children to be with us QUICKLY!!!

Lord prepare their eyes and their spirits for our photos tonight. No one can communicate with them but you Lord. You speak their language, you speak into their hearts and into their minds the truth. Give them a deep and trusting understanding of who we are the moment they see our pictures. Have them fall instantly in love with us, the same way you allowed us to fall in love with them the moment we first laid eyes on them. Praise you Father! Thank you for being with them, holding them, comforting them and encouraging them while they're so far away from us.

These three can't wait to show you their new brother and sister! If we pass court we'll show them to you Tuesday Dec 1st!!!!!!!

October Update

We received an email from our agency with updated photos and information on our kiddos! We finally saw a picture of them together, and you could just tell they love each other, and that they have hearts full of joy. They were both smiling, and we just can't wait to go get em!

We also learned they do not speak Amharic, so that makes me a little more anxious to go get them. It's strange to explain, but I was more at peace believing they had care givers who were talking to them, explaining their transition, coaxing their grief, etc, but now that I know they don't understand what they're saying either, it makes me want to hasten this step of their transition. But, it's all God's perfect timing, and He is in control of taking care of them and protecting them and making them feel love, so what more could I ask for them. . .

Can't wait until December 1st, when we pass court, and I can post their sweet faces for all of you to fall in love with too!

We have a COURT DATE!!!!!!

So God speaks to me, and since He knows I hear Him, He's very specific, and He's very intentional with me. I could list countless stories of God asking me to do AB or C, and the moment I did how the blessings poured in. So, back in September God asked me to fast from Sugar until we received our referral. And I did, expecting it to be 9 months or more, and our referral came at 9 days. And then our referral was pulled the next morning, but I obstinately refused to go back on the fast. For days I persisted in my resistance, constantly justifying to God why it wasn't fair. . . and finally, in a prayerful fit of tears, I repented of my bad heartitude and agreed to be obedient. This time, He called me to fast from flour and sugar, not until our referral, but until we traveled, with my main prayer focus to be on our court date. Our court date? But we didn't even have a referral yet, I argued! But, I agreed and committed to Him I would fast and pray.
While I was still laying there, the phone rang, and it was our second referral call, for our siblings! I was on fire for the Lord, fasting without reservation, praying diligently for the Lord to bless our court date. Court opened, dates were being assigned, I was being obedient, things were clicking along. But then, for some reason, I don't even remember why, I justified breaking the fast. God had told me at the beginning I could break the fast for our family birthdays, for Thanksgiving, and Christmas, but it wasn't any of these, and I was just being rebellious. And I continued through this rebellion for a couple of weeks. And court date assignments STOPPED. Not a single one.
My birthday came and went, as did the kids, and I began to have a change of heart with God and my fasting disobedience. I repented, agreed to return to it, and struggled for two days to be obedient. I'm the best justifier in the world, and it gets me no where but outside of God's will for my life.
Yesterday, I woke up and had a new resolve with Him. Jason and I committed the entire family to a different particular fast until we passed court and with that, I was able to withstand temptation and fulfill my fast yesterday. I fell asleep in peace last night knowing I had chosen wisely all day.
God has never been unresponsive to me, He always rewards my efforts to press into Him more, and yet, I'm still shocked every time He does. I hoped for some movement in the Ethiopian courts today, there are 11 families ahead of us in line for court dates, and I just simply wanted to see their names pop up on the Yahoo Group and rejoice with them over their court dates, I was poised to type a gazillion exclamation points, and then it happened! An email from our agency, could it be, it was!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OUR COURT DATE ARRIVED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Who am I that God rests His favor so abundantly on my family? Who are we that He is so lavishly pouring Himself out on us??? May we turn it back as Glory to His Name!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pray, Pray, Pray for our children's first earthly father to appear in court, for all documents to be in place, so that we may be one of the 50% of families who pass court on the first go round.
PRAY DECEMBER 1st!!!!!!!!!!!! That means, the night of November 30th until the morning of December 1st, because of the time difference. PRAY WITH US TO BRING THEM TO THEIR NEW HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, and one more note, our first care package will be traveling to Ethiopia on 11-18-2009, and will arrive to them on Thanksgiving Day! Which means that over our Thanksgiving celebrations, our children will be seeing the faces of their new family for the first time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How cool is that??????

The Bio-Sibling Effect of Adoption

I've answered this question many times to myself and others, and this mother's wisdom says it better than I ever could. I watched a TLC program about a mom with 17 children one night and her quote at the end of the program was, "If you have an opportunity to expand your love, take it." It's been posted in my kitchen ever since. This post echos that thought.

From Blessings from Ethiopia - The Weimer Family

To each and every person reading this post who knows the concrete conviction of being called to care for the older orphans yet also bears the weight of the accompanying thoughts of fear, I want you to know this...Please hear me loud and clear, as we have now SIX times over displaced our "original" kids' birth order:

You are NOT taking anything AWAY from your birth children. Instead, what you are doing is imparting to them something eternal: You are expanding their capacity to love. Think about that for a minute before you read anything else. How do you plan to teach your child to love others unconditionally and in total compassion without giving them the opportunity to do so? I'm telling you now, You CAN'T.

My biological children have a greater capacity of love in their hearts than I could ever impart to them by just giving them a safe Christianity, by maintaining their status quo, by simply modeling "godliness" as parents (as if that's the end-all be-all for a Christian family). My kids...all of them...have lived out self-sacrifice and understand (because they live it!) that laying down one's life does not steal anything from us. That is the lie of the devil, who would have us believe that sacrifice is not worth it; that there is nothing for us in return; that God doesn't really mean what He says when He said to His followers that "anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. [Because] Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it" (Matthew 10:38-39).

Do you really believe that? That whoever LOSES his life for Jesus' sake, for Jesus the Orphan's sake, will actually FIND it? Ask yourself honestly. Because you might answer YES prematurely. I have no doubt that you might believe it for yourself, but do you really believe it for your children, too? That if they "lose" their "place" in the family that Jesus will instead impart to them LIFE? REAL life???

What is birth order anyway but just a sequence of how your child came to you? Let's not make an idol of that sequence. Because that's what it becomes...an IDOL. Something standing in the way of you taking up the Cross to follow Him, to BE JESUS in this world. Let's not place a value on birth order that God did not intend to be there.

Consider the older orphan. Consider the sibling groups. Consider the ones who are not often considered.

And whatever you do on your adoption journey, PLEASE I beg you, do NOT steal from your children the opportunity for their love capacity to be expanded. Do not deny them the true gift of learning early in life that "My life is not my own."

When your feisty and spunky 7-year-old biological daughter, who is now the middle child of 9 after being knocked down to #5 from #2, pleads "Please, Mommy, Please!!! I want another sister my age!!! Can we PLEASE adopt again?!!," your heart will beat out of your chest, not just because you can envision another child saved, but because you know that your daughter will NEVER EVER live a limited, safe Christianity. She won't even know what that means. In fact, she won't even have the capacity do so.

And all because you didn't limit her, either. You didn't limit God.

Give your children the gift of the greater capacity to love. Let it ripple out into the future. Let it change the world.

Court Dates and Speculating

So, I usually hate to speculate, because God is so full of surprises that I'm usually proven wrong, but I can't help but try and figure out some things with our adoption timeline. . . So, we'll start with the for sure news . . . the family who is scheduled to take our first care package to B&D passed court today, yeah!, so our care package will be on its way soon! We can't wait to know they've seen our faces too!
Another family unfortunately did not pass and announced they were rescheduled for court on November 24th. Although, court dates are not necessarily scheduled in order of referral, they generally are, and we are number 12 on the list of yahoo group families waiting for a first court date. I don't anticiapte getting a court date until mid December at this point, if that early, so we are going to take a deep breath and conclude that we will not travel before Christmas. We're a little surprised that there are no families in our group scheduled for court between the 12th and 24th, and only 4 families for the entire month of November at all. We're hoping this is not a trend that continues, we're anxious to get them home and shorten the amount of in-transition time between their two families.
And, that's all we know, or guess, for now. We have 12 screaming 8 year olds in the other room here for Nathan's birthday. Guess I better down this Excedrin Migraine pill and go back into the trenches and relieve Jason for a bit.

OUCH - 14 Times and counting!!!!

Today was the day Brooklyn has been dreading for months since we agreed she should travel with us to Ethiopia - vaccines at the International Travel Clinic!
She fared quite nicely I'd say, thanks to her age and her Immunization Records, she only received two shots today, the Flu Vaccine, and her Typhoid Fever vax! Jason had 5 shots, and I had to have 6! Ouwie!
So, you're counting 2+5+6 and thinking I can't add because that's only 13, not 14. . . .
The real ouch was when she tallied our bill to $725.00!!!!!!!

Since we were already at $725, we decided to save spending an additional $180 and get Brooklyn's Meningitis and Hep A vaccines at her pediatrician , and we all have to go back for the Yellow Fever vaccine next month which will be another $450 dollars. PLUS! We are researching whether or not the boys need to have the Typhoid vaccine. Jason and I also have to go back for 2 more Hep B shots next month with the Yellow Fever, the boys have to have their Hep A and Flu shots, and then we all have to have the Hep A and B boosters again in 6 months. Geeze!!!

All worth it though! I feel like I've done a hundred push ups. . . think I'll go take some Advil.

Our Nephew Rhett!

My brother and sis-in-law are adopting their second baby through AWAA China, and today she awoke to new pictures of her son! They are waiting on their TA, basically an appointment with the consulate in China and their travel authorizations, etc, so they can go pick him up! We're both hoping to travel by the end of the year, but God is in control of the time table and we're both good with His perfect plan.

Enjoy his adorableness!

More Bureacratic Hoops on the Horizon

Ethiopia, a country roughly twice the size of Texas, has approximately 5 million orphans. Earlier this year, all court cases for children who were registered as abandoned, rather than relinquished, were halted in their process while Ethiopia conducted an internal investigation into whether or not children were being obtained by orphanages illegally for the purpose of selling adoptions. Our agency and orphanages were not included in this investigation, but it nonetheless held up many of our families waiting to travel and gather their children home. The investigation was completed, new process were installed by the Ethiopian Government, and all those cases have been resolved and the children are home with their forever families.
Now, in response, some 6 months later, our government has extended the issuing of visas for adopted Ethiopian children from one week to possibly several months while they conduct their own investigation into each child's legitimacy for adoption. A process that is already conducted in court by the Ethiopian justice system. In order to pass court, our children's father must appear in court to testify why he can not raise his children himself, and prove their orphan status, and then we are legally declared their parents. Now, the US Government is saying it wants to investigate that again.
Satan is just trying to screw with adoption. He is trying to make it as difficult, long, and bureaucratic as possible to discourage new families from pursuing adoption, and to leave these 5 million children in bondage.
We do not know how long this could delay our "expected timeline" but the truth is, it doesn't change the day our children will be in our arms for the first time by one second. God has been in control, knew this was coming, and prepared everything perfectly in full understanding of this coming. We are at peace with His ability to fight this war and to win the battle for these children.
Pray with us that this does not become a hindrance in the adoption process for any family or any child who needs a home, and that this situation would be quickly resolved and absolved.

Shots - Shots - Sing a Song of Shots

So I took Brooklyn to the Dr. today just to confirm that she did in fact have the swine flu, and since she's over the worst of it, she was simply thrilled to get a three week pass from P.E. out of going to the Dr, until our impending travel came up in conversation. Although I've been consciously aware, and discussed the need for international travel vaccines often, I've never put it into a time frame in my head. Today I realized I'm already behind! So add that to our list of to-do's. Pray for us Friday! We'll be going to get our shots and Brooklyn said she'd rather have the swine flu again, although she quickly added a "not really God," to the end of that exclamation!

Court is Now in Session! All Rise!

We received word today from our agency that the courts in Ethiopia did open for cases finally and all the families who were scheduled for last week posted their new court dates on the board today!!! Our agency is hoping to have court dates scheduled for all of us within the next 2-3 weeks!! So exciting!!!!!
In the meantime, we've done some shopping for our care package and have set the things out in the kitchen for the kids to play with, the cat to rub on, the dog to sniff etc. They should have our love (and crazy smell) all over them by the time it's time to send them to Ethiopia!

We've seen their faces, what's next?

We've set their beautiful faces as the backdrops on our phones, they've been added to the refrigerator, and we smile every time we look at their precious eyes, and noses, and sweet cheeks. . . They've been grafted into our hearts, and we're beginning to long to go to them, hug them, assure them God has redeemed their future, and bring them home. But what happens next many of you are asking us. . .

The next thing is that we go to court. Here's what our agency said to us regarding court. . .

The court confirmed today that they will not be reopening until Oct. 12th. Once they begin work it will likely take a week or more for them to issue new court dates.
I know this time of waiting can be so hard as you long to be united with your children. I am sorry that we will have to wait more time for any new news. I am hopeful that new court dates will be given for early November but we will not receive any confirmation from the court until they begin work again. At this time, the court is putting all new cases onto a waiting list and will provide us with your family’s confirmed court date sometime in early October. We will contact your family with the date as soon as we receive it from the court. Roughly 60% of families will pass court on the first issued date, while 40% of the cases will require a second court date for successful completion of court. Second court dates can be issued 2 to 8 weeks after an initial court date. Once a family has successfully passed court they can anticipate traveling 2.5 - 4weeks later.

Families who received referrals on the same day (or within the same week or few weeks) as other families will not necessarily have a court date within the same week or few weeks. Each adoption is unique and court dates do not always fall within chronological order of receiving a referral. The paperwork needed to secure a court date, and the time frame to acquire the paperwork, is unique for each adoption. These factors, along with the court’s appointment availability, will affect the timing for your specific court date.

Often times after families pass court; America World cannot immediately begin to plan travel. Documentation from the Ethiopia court systems must be completed and received in order to move forward with booking flights and further travel plans. Therefore, please be prepared to possibly book flights a week before traveling.

So there you have it, we're waiting on court dates to be issued, praying that once that date arrives, their father will appear in court, and all the necessary paperwork will be in line for them to pass us on the first go round, and then we'll proceed with figuring out when we can travel!

What are we doing in the meantime?

1. Getting our care packages together. We're required to send at least one, but of course we'll send as many as we can! We're creating a family album to send so they can begin to see our faces, recognize our home, our pets, their grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. We'll also be sending along a toy for each of them, an outfit and one of those nifty cards that you can record on . . we want our voices to begin imprinting on their hearts.

Care packages are sent through other families who are traveling to pick up their children. Our sweet friend Karen has agreed to make room in her luggage for ours, and we are praying earnestly for her to pass court on the first try so that she can take our package and pick up her son at the end of October! She'll also take pictures or videos of B and D for us, so we'll hopefully get to see them in action!!!!!! These are crucial to beginning the bonding process, and for easing the difficult transition these babies will go through. They'll see us one day in the Transition Home, have one more night there in the familiar, and then leave with us the next day for ever. It's looking at our pictures and enjoying the things we send that will make us a little less "scary and strange."

2. We're trying to decide on a name for little boy D. His given name is a little difficult for me to wrap my tongue and mind around, so we're contemplating different ways of Americanizing it. I stopped by and spoke with an Ethiopian family who owns a restaurant in Dallas and they gave me some great advice, but we're still undecided. . . He'll officially keep his given name, but we'll call and have him go by a slightly different version of it. . . Little girl B is an easy one, and she'll also keep her given name, but it's got a natural American "nickname" that we all fell in love with instantly.

3. Complete Online Training. Because we're adopting older children, and their memories of their first family are in tact, and they've already developed many coping skills, mannerisms, established their personal norms, etc, we have to prepare ourselves for the challenges that this will bring along with it when we blend them in to our family with our expectations, boundaries, etc. I'm sure another 2 hours of online training is not what Jason's looking forward to after the 8 hours of Hague we already completed, but alas, it will help save more hours than it costs us hopefully!

4. Figure out where we're going to put them! If you've seen our house, you know this is going to be a feat! We're tightly packed in as it is, and it's going to get tighter! We've got to buy new beds, bigger dressers, and clear out some closet space! My clothes horse pre-teen is not looking forward to this particular situation!

Well, I'm suddenly feeling a little overwhelmed. I think I'll go eat some string cheese now.

It's A Double Blessing!

Oh my Goodness!!!!! What a week!! We've gone from waiting, to soaring, to mourning, to flying! We are still standing in AWE at how God moves. We have been very submissive from the beginning to God, giving Him total control over our referral. Jason believed almost from the beginning that the Holy Spirit had told him we would have a 4 and a 2 year old, and he's also been telling everyone we would know them and maybe even have them home by Christmas. Of course, I'm the one actively involved, with the paperwork, with the adoption groups online, so I would often remind him, since I "knew better" that his "predictions" were highly unlikey but nonetheless he would keep saying it to everyone who asked. And alas, it appears he heard God very clearly when the Holy Spirit told him about our children, and if court goes well, his predictions on when they could be home might come in right on target as well.

We never would have imagined when our referral was pulled last Thursday that this was God's plan, although we knew with ABSOLUTE CERTAINTY that He had one.

We received a call this morning giving us some more information on why our referral had been pulled back. They needed time to investigate their suspisions that "B" had a sibling! As it turned out, "B's" 2 year old brother had been referred out separately. They had recalled his referral as well, and were calling to offer us both of their referrals!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We have a beautiful 4 year old daughter and a handsome 2 year old son! We swear he has our middle bio sons lips!!! :)

It's absolutely unbelievable. I have so much I want to say, so many things that God has confirmed and done in the last few short days, but I'm not removed enough to think clearly! I'll come back to this so that I can give them every detail of "Their Story" but for now, we're just basking in the amazing providence of God.

One Day Later

I'm still processing, still getting my head around what my heart went through in that 24 hours. My sister-in-law Amy put it best for me in a text, I couldn't talk to anyone, so she wrote,

"When you said yes in your heart you said yes to being her mommy, God asked you to step out in faith. You did. All He asked you to do was step. . . the answer [to all this] will be glorious. I don't understand why this happened. But it's ok to be sad and grieve."

I needed permission to grieve for some reason. How do you understand for yourself, how do you even begin to explain the depth of love you have instantaneously for a child you've just laid eyes on? It wasn't because she was beautiful, or because she was motherless and under nourished. It wasn't because I needed to love another child. It was because I had been asked to be her mommy, she had been offered to me as my daughter. Everything I do I do with passion. I can meet a million adorable babies and toddlers on the street and think they're great but no one has ever said, "Here is this child. Will you love her as your own? Will you be her mother, will you fold her into your heart?" When I said yes I meant it.

Now obviously, true relationship, true intimacy comes from investing yourself. Just as those first few months after my three bio kids were born, it was a time of bonding, and a depth of love developing that is beautiful and built on experiences together, trust from needs being offered and met. I know that I will go through that same period with this adopted child when they come home, I know that the love from intimacy will take time to develop and grow, but I now know that the deep sold out spiritual love, the desire to pray for a child's every breath and especially their salvation, the love that dares to dream about the different ways they will fit in your family, and what things will look like because you now have a face,an age, a sex, to fit into that picture you've been dreaming about for months, that love is instant. I've suffered a miscarriage of my heart, and it's painful.

Yesterday was tough because I was allowing Satan to whisper in my ear. Saying things like, "You've only seen this child for 18 hours, what difference does it make. You don't have a right to be upset. You don't have anything to be sad about. Just forget about it, act like these past 18 hours didn't happen. OH, you have this strong faith huh, you know God has the perfect child for you, and you just deceived yourself into believing this was her, you don't hear Him at all like you think you do, huh? You've been so wrong, you are making up that voice you thought was His. If you think He'll work all this out, then you don't have a right to be upset or sad, you would have already gotten over this if your faith were what you're claiming it to be."

But the truth is, my faith in God never wavered. I never faltered in knowing with full confidence that God is in total control. I don't doubt one moment that this situation is part of our story, that it is necessary, that we were chosen to receive her picture, even if that's all it is, for a higher purpose than our eyes can see. I believe God knows what He's doing and He's redeeming every circumstance for His glory.

So, when my faith in my God did not waiver, the enemy used it as a time to attack my marriage. Jason and I have been through some tough crap, but it was serious for 5 hours last night. In all honesty, it had about 1% to do with our referral being pulled back, and about 99% to do with our misplaced needs and choices, but satan used this circumstance to make me doubt so much of what I believed about my marriage. It was 30 seconds of a hugely stupid insensitivity on Jason's part, and 8 hours of satan manipulating and twisting. I keep going back and adding adjectives to his insensitivity. Guess I'm not done forgiving. .. . but I digress :)

Adoption is so near to God's heart, that I believe it puts a big ole target on our backs for the enemy. After surviving this latest battle, I'm grateful for the opportunity to shore up the cracks a little more. Jason learned some lessons, I learned a lot of lessons, our marriage will be stronger, more impenetrable going forward, and we're more resolved to complete this adoption together as a unified team. Satan's goal was to create doubt in our ability to trust the other in this adoption and to have us give it up, and for a while last night he probably thought he was winning, but like always in our relationship, the Warrior, the Victorious Conqueror was called in to the ring, and the three of us are indefeatable.

The Lord provided me with so much support. My dear friends who understood I couldn't talk, and simply kept emailing and texting me throughout the day, it got me through. Praise God for our adoption yahoo group, other parents who are going through the same thing, many who have received their referral and understand how much they love that child, and how much it must hurt to have them removed. And a small few who have been through what happened to us yesterday. God uses the testimony of survivors to gird us up. Others who say, it's ok to be confused, pissed, sad, to grieve.

For my non-adopting readers, yes, this is extremely rare. There is no reason to withhold complete love and devotion from the instant you see a referral picture. There is no reason to think, "I better guard my heart, this could fall apart." No one sees their referral picture for the first time and thinks, "I'm not going to call this child my daughter until we're on the plane coming home and it's really happening." Any other adoptive mother who had seen her child, and then 18 hours later gotten the call that they weren't, would be as devastated as I am.

Will we receive another referral? Yes. Will we believe and realize at that time that no other child could be as perfect for us and will all the events come into clear focus and be amazing, yes. Does that negate the fact that "B" was an equal fulfillment of all of God's promises, prophecies and dreams for us? No.

God doesn't ask us to hold back, He asks us to step . . .

Referral Pulled

AWAA called this morning and said information has come up in Ethiopia and they need to pull our referral.

No one ever said International Adoption was without ups and downs.

They said they can't give any details and don't really know what will happen going forward but they might know more in a week or two.

We're just praying to see God's hand, to understand His peace even if we can't understand why.

It's A GIRL!

We received the coveted phone call today, about 9 months earlier than we were expecting! I will post later about how perfect God is, how He speaks so clearly and yet we filter His words through so much of our own "stuff" that we sometimes misunderstand them, and how merciful He is that He fulfills His plans into PERFECTION in our lives!

But for now, I can tell you, she is absolutely beautiful. Be praying now that we pass court and I will be able to show you her amazing face! Her eyes will melt your heart!
Begin to let our Beautiful "B" fill your hearts, pray for her as she waits for her new family and grieves the loss of her first family, pray for her health in the Transition Home, and for a successful court date!
Praise you Lord! You are amazing, your timing is perfect, your ways are masterful! Glory to your name!

Dossier Arrives in Ethiopia!

DTE at DISNEY

We celebrated our official DTE while in Disney, and this is Disney's year of a million celebrations, so we added ours to the mix and wrote WE'RE DTE on our buttons. Jason was at first peeved that I had not written WE'RE ADOPTING or something that people could understand just by reading it, but writing something strange and unknown actually opened a door we were not expecting. Instead of reading our button and moving on with their lives, SO MANY people couldn't help but ask, "What's DTE?" and it was the perfect opportunity to share our story, our faith, and our journey! We talked to several people about Ethiopia, about adoption in general, and shared our faith. We heard so many say, "I've thought about that, but doesn't it cost a lot?" Which gave me the chance to share what God has done in our lives to provide, and how He will do the same for them. I was able to live and share our testimony to so many who would have never stopped and bothered discussing it with us otherwise. My life's call lately has been "We shall overcome by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony." and by focusing on this, being willing to share what God has done in my life whenever it's relevant, I've been amazed at the opportunities God's put in my lap to do just that. Adoption is a journey, and it needs more people on the journey! Whatever we can do to share our faith, and our story, I'm ready and willing!

DTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We got our email from Nicole, our family Coordinator at AWAA confirming our DTE date of 9/4/2009!

"Root Family, you've finally become DTE!

What are you going to do next?"

"We're going to DISNEY WORLD!"

What makes it so incredible is that many many moons ago I asked God to make a way for us to take the kids on one last "Family of Five" vacation, and He did. Then as things drug out, a few months back I prayed that He would please let all the pieces come together so that we could be finished with our paper pregnancy before we left on our trip, and HE DID IT! Our cruise and our DTE date are the same!!!!! YOU ROCK GOD!!!! Your timing is PERFECT, I'm sorry when I momentarily lose sight of that sometimes!!!!!

Psalm 68:31 ". . .Ethiopia will quickly stretch out her hands to God." We're praying for you little package, you're our love, desires, hopes, and obedience wrapped up in a little box. Be safe, travel quickly.

First Day of School

Today was the first day of school in our district. Per our usual tradition, I lined the kids up in front of the garage to take their picture before we piled into the car. I yelled out, "Kids! Get together and put your arms around your brothers and sister, like you like each other."

I started snapping away and I hear Jason giggling behind me. I realized I was zoomed in and not getting Nathan's arm. A bit frustrated I said, "Come on Nathan, put your arm down," thinking he was being difficult, until Jason said, "Gina, he's putting his arm around our other kids." Nathan just looked over at his arm as if there was another kid standing there and started giggling.

He's such an adorable character. Wherever and whoever our "unknown" children are in the world today, know this, your family - already - sight unseen - dearly loves, includes, and giggles over you.

From Our Agency. . .

Decorating the Ethiopia Transitional Home
A small volunteer group will be traveling this Friday to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia with the mission of decorating our Ethiopia Transitional Home. Our desire is for our Transitional Home to feel more like a home and be as welcoming as it can be to the children and babies who will live there temporarily.
We are working on creating new baby beds and bunk beds and on adding more lighting. We are also having the floors redone and painting murals in the school room, boys room, girls room and baby room. We also hope to paint murals in the court yard.
We would like to raise funds to help with this project through our Orphan's Ticket Home campaign. We cannot purchase the supplies without your help. Any amount will benefit this endeavor. You can donate here. Just be sure to put in the Notes section: Ethiopia Transitional Home Decorating.
We will be sure to share the photos with you of the updates!
Thank you!
AWAA

Just as a note: You receive a tax donation form if you wish to make the place our children will live for almost a year of their life more comfortable!

We're in the System!

We can no longer commit any major crimes and hope to escape unnoticed. Our prints are officially in the FBI system! The lady taking mine commented, "Oh! Wonderful, your prints are so nice and plump! Most stay at home mom's we scan have no fingerprints at all. It's as if they've scrubbed them off with a brilo pad." To which I have to say thank you Rita for exposing two of my most negative secrets, 1. Everything about me is nice and plump sister, and 2. No, I do not do housework or scrub anything with a brilo pad thereby creating any opportunity for removing my fingerprints. They are and will forever be present and accounted for.
Let the countdown to our I-171H arriving begin. And please allow me to apologize to the mailman in advance, excuse me, mail lady, I will be stalking you. Whenever your loud little red truck with the magnetic US Post RURAL sign slapped crooked on the door is heard coming down the street, engine and brakes alternating in a hum and a screech as you stop at each mailbox, I will run out like a mad woman, and I may even forget to make sure I'm properly dressed. This is your two week notice.

We have APPOINTMENTS!

Today has been a really great day! My mom kept her job amid massive downsizing, prayers for those who didn't, I reached my first goal in my healthy lifestyle plan, my first adoption tshirt arrived in the mail, can't wait to sport it around town, our truck is ready at the shop, and God provided the funds to pay for all the repairs, and

OUR FINGERPRINT APPOINTMENTS ARRIVED FROM USCIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Once we complete these appointments, our I-171H should arrive in the mail a few weeks later and then we'll be DTE and move from PAPER CHASING to WAITING FOR REFERRAL!

God Provides, yes He does!

Why do we worry? Why do we even think about taking one step on that path? I'm learning not to. I'm learning not to entertain even the hint of concern over life, finances, my children, the future. Because I serve a God who loves to pour out blessing on me. He loves me to death, literally. He delights in providing for me. He gets a kick out of coming through for me when I need help. He giggles when I tear up with shear joy from seeing Him move on my behalf.

I almost stepped my foot on the path to worry about the rest of the money for this adoption. I was concerned about the flights, physically and financially, and God showed me today that He's got it all under control. So I'm done! I'm laughing with excitement to see how God provides next, cuz it just gets cooler and cooler, the ways He finds to surprise me. Goose pimples, gotta love em!

We're State Certified!

Our State Certification seals came in the mail today! Now we're just waiting on our fingerprint appts and then our I-171H to arrive and we're DTE! Everything else is in and waiting on the Immigration Dept!

We got the receipt for our I-600A!

Tonight when I went to the mailbox I got the receipt for our I-600A from the USCIS office, which means our 1171-H is officially on the way! (But still a good 2-3 months out!) I'm so excited! We're one half step closer to being DTE!!!
(Don't you non-adopting families just love all this lingo which is plain garbled rubbish to you!?!?) Just say a whoo hoo with us! It's great news!

Moving Along!

I haven't had a moment free to post, but I thought I would carve one out just to update the timeline and preserve some thoughts. . .

The last two weeks have been extremely hectic on the homefront and the adoption front simultaneously! (Of course) We recieved our home study from Katherine, which means we are able to move forward with the next steps in the process. We spent most of Friday in line at the Passport office, what a nightmare! It's of course a usually non-eventful activity but never when it involves our family! Today the kids and I spent a few hours in the car and too much time walking from building to building in downtown Fort Worth trying to obtain Criminal Background Checks on Jason and I. I also mailed off our USCIS application, so we are getting so close to finishing up the paper chase and submitting our dossier.

We're also in the middle of deciding whether or not to sell our home and move. It's a financial and emotional decision I'm just not being willing to commit to either way. On one hand, I want to stay in this house because it makes the MOST financial sense, but on the other hand, I don't know how it's physically possible to fit two more children, or even one more child, into this cozy home. Add to that the stress of home repair, getting a new roof, and a new fence, and replacing a ton of electronics that were damaged in the lightning strike, and I'm just money poor and exhausted.

And today while I'm on the verge of tears with the weight of all of these decisions on my shoulders, I'm thinking about those precious souls God has chosen for our family, and it seems nothing is too complicated or potentially financially stressful to undertake in order to bring them home where God has called them.

Spirit of Fear

For you did not receive a spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received a spirit of adoption. By which we call, "Abba, Father!" Romans 8:12

So I've been doing amazingly well with the ups and downs of this adoption. I have not allowed myself to be consumed with anxiety or obsession. I have allowed peace and understanding to reign in every area of this adventure, that is until Sunday night.

We had our Home Study and our Social Worker's job is to question the ever living out of us concerning the possible negative issues our children will arrive with and to grill us about our ability to handle those needs. I never once wavered in my belief that God is in control but satan began whispering in my ear all sorts of retarded lies. I won't say I believed them, because I never lost focus on what God has told me, that my children, all 5 of them, will be emotionally and physically healthy and fully attached to me and Jason and to each other, but the weariness of the road it could take to achieve that began to overwhelm me. That coupled with my first sense of their rejection by others, and I opened the door for the spirit of fear.

I attended a powerful prayer meeting on Monday night in which God confirmed for me I hear Him, and I can trust what He's said to me, because He always fulfills His promises. Towards the end of the evening, the room is opened up and people begin to simply share what they hear the Holy Spirit telling them about anyone in the room, and I began to ask God to confirm for me through a stranger in the room that I was gifted with what I needed to bring these children home and be the parent they needed so that I could put away my fears. And wouldn't you know it, GOD delivered, answered, and provided! The only African in the room, a man so dark even the whites of his eyes were hard to define, raised his hand and pointed at me. He said, "Are you a Dr? I see Doctor all over you." His accent was so strong, it made his statement even more definitive. In that instant I knew God was confirming that I was the Dr my children would need, I will be able to minister to their needs, and heal their deficiencies. Not by my might, but because the Holy Spirit lives in me, and by His power, and by the blood of the Son we can all be perfectly healed, not just in heaven, but in this life.

I've begun to allow God to show me glimpses of them in my prayer time with Him, an image I've frequently shaken out of my vision before, out of just sheer overwhelmedness! :) But, in the last few days I've just allowed the Spirit to take me there, and it's nothing short of skydiving, the sensation of seeing things unseen. They are beautiful and my heart is filling with them already. I'm beginning to yearn for them in a new way. To have a sudden fear response, similar to the one I have when I jerk around to look in the back seat because I think I've left a child behind at a resteraunt. I've often had dreams that my children have been left alone at home, or somewhere frightening, and no matter how hard I run, it seems I'm unable to get to them, and that sense of angst to get to them is beginning to develop in relation to these two precious ones I've never even met.

It's the healthy side of being ready to go. I will not question God's timing, I know it's perfect, I will not fear when ups and downs arise as they always do in international adoptions, but I will continue to grow in my eagerness to get to them, to bring them, home, to hold them, and to begin the rest of their lives as Crazy Roots.

Our Secret's Out!

It was so wonderful to finally tell all of our family and friends. The kids have been dying to scream it from the rooftops, and it makes it more official now that we've received so many well wishes! It's going to be a crazy journey and we look forward to honoring God with each step of it!

The Sibling Point of View

I learned a couple of years ago that I could trust Brooklyn to keep a good secret! So, when Jason and I decided to obey our Call to Adoption, we first brought Brooklyn into the circle of prayer and confirmation time! The Sunday we prayed with Arnita and cemented our decision to adopt, I was talking with Brooklyn in the bathroom before church. She was jabbering away in her usual adorable chatter, and said, "O.K., so mom, are we adopting or not adopting?" To which I replied, "I don't know, Brooklyn. We just have to know it's God's will. There are a lot of things that have to fall into place right, and if God's not going before us making them happen, it could get really ugly. So, I believe we are being called to this by Him, but right now daddy and I are just praying to KNOW that this is His will for our family, and we would really appreciate you praying too."

So we rushed off to church and afterward when we got home she says, "Guess what our lesson was about this morning?" "Praying the Will of God!"

After school the next day she came into my office and said, "O.K. I've been praying for two days and I don't know if I'm really hearing God or just hearing my own thoughts that I want to hear. So I've given up, and now I'm praying that you and daddy will just hear Him really clearly." So I asked her, well, what do you think you're hearing. And she said, "All I'm hearing is that yes we should, but since that's what I really want, I don't know if that's God too." We then had a lengthy conversation about deciphering the Holy Spirit speaking to you, and then when I told her daddy and I had applied, she just started jumping up and down and going silly crazy!

When we told Nathan he exclaimed, "We're getting an Ethiopian boy!" extremely loud, and Corban ran around whooping and slapping his rear end like an Indian Warrior. (not that I know whether or not they slapped their rear ends in their dancing)


Our First Family Prayer Time after Application Approval

Once we told the boys, I was thrilled to sit down and pray over the situation as a family. Here's a portion of what each prayed.

Lord, Thank you for our awesome family and how much fun we have. Please help it be the same when our new brother or brothers come. And please give us the ability to get the cars and a house and pay for all of the stuff for the adoption. - Brooklyn age 10

Thank you for the little dude coming next year and please keep him safe and healthy and be getting lots of hugs. Thank you for our family. - Nathan age 7

Thank you for dying on the cross and shedding your blood for our sins. Thank you for helping me pour out my heart to you. Lord, help all those who don't believe you, make them believe in you. Thank you for everyone you created, and thank you for all the stuff you created. Please protect my brother in Ethiopia from any accidents and help him get lots of love and all the food he needs to eat. Thanks for loving us God, I love you. - Corban age 5 (and yes, I cry a lot at bedtime prayers, because he prays like this a lot!)

The Crazy Roots

The Crazy Roots July 2010

Our Three Biological Children Feb 2009

Our Family Blog Can Be Found Here

Our Paper Pregnancy

1. Apply to America World. 02-16-09
2. Wait for Approval. Received 02-27-09
3. Return Adoption Agreement and First Payment. 03-02-09
4. Wait for Homestudy Contact. 03-18-09
5. Dossier Documents arrive from AWAA. 03-12-09
6. Wait for Homestudy Documents to arrive. 03-18-09
7. LET THE PAPER CHASE BEGIN 03-20-09
8. Obtain Copies of Birth Certificates done
9. Obtain Copy of Marriage License done
10. Apply for Passports $702.70 07-03-09
11. Request and Notarize Letters of Employment done
12. Home Study Application done
13. Autobiographies Completed done
14. Criminal Background Checks
15. ResidentialHistory done
16. Statement of Faith done
17. Medical Examinations for Each Member of the Family done
18. Fire Protection Inspection 4/20/09
19. Environmental Health Inspection 5-31-09
20. Copies of Tax Returns done
21. Pet Vaccination Verifications done
22. Current Financial Statements done
23. Create Floor Plan of the Home done
24. Photo Session of the House done
25. Home Study Reference Forms done - finally! :)
26. Homestudy Interview 1 5-30-09
27. Homestudy Interview 2 5-31-09
28. Homestudy Interview 3 6-7-09
29. Gina Hague Training Complete $87.50 5-30-09
30. Jason Hague Training $87.50 6-4-09
31. Reference Letter A 07-02-09
32. Reference Letter B 07-12-09
33. Reference Letter C 07-15-09
34. Final Copy of Homestudy 07-01-09
35. Receive Passports 07-11-09
36. Criminal Background Check Jason $20.00 07-06-09
37. Criminal Background Check Gina $25.00 07-06-09
38. Send USCIS I-600A Application $860.00 07-06-09
39. Receipt for I-600A arrives from USCIS office 07-10-09
40. Family Photos Taken 07-12-09
41. Mail off for State Certification of Docs 07-13-09
42. Receive State Certification Documents 07-17-09
43. Receive Fingerprint Appointments 07-23-09
44. Complete Fingerprint Appointments 08-14-09
45. Receive I-171H 08-25-09
46. Mail Dossier to AWAA 08-25-09
47. OFFICIALLY DTE 09-04-09
48. Receive 4 year old Girl Referral 09-23-09
49. Referral Nullified 09-24-09
50. Sadness, Questions, Tears 09-24-09
51. Peace, Resolve, Ready to Wait Again 09-25-09
52. Receive Sibling Referrals 09-29-09
53. Receive over and above and accept referral 10-06-09
54. Receive Schedule of Court Date 10-29-09
55. First Court Date - Failed - 12-01-09
56. Pass Court 12-08-09
57. Receive Tentative Travel Dates (TTD) 12-09-09
58. Confirm Post Court Paperwork Complete 12-18-09
59. Receive Confirmed Travel Dates 12-18-09
60. Travel to Ethiopia 01-10-10
61. Meet our Children 01-18-10
62. Pick up our Children 01-19-10
63. Arrive Home and Begin our New Crazy Life 01-23-10
64. File for Re-Adoption in the State of Texas $308.00 07-14-10
65. Court Appearance to Validate Adoption in U.S. 07-29-10

Our Decision to Adopt

GOD SPOKE - WE OBEYED
God is so good. One day you can be sitting in church, completely satisfied with your life, your family, your marriage. You have the perfect number of kids, your feeling like life is truly complete, and then woosh. The Holy Spirit falls on you afresh, and everything turns upside down! Oh Beautiful Moment.

For Jason and I there had always been a heart for adoption in our lives. We understood the importance of taking care of God's children, how every child deserves the love of a family, and the chance to grow up in a Christ centered home. But, it was always something we believed God had for others. We were too strapped to even consider it anyway.

On December 15, 2008, Jason and I paid off our last consumer debt bill, and were, except for the mortgage, debt free. It was as if God was sitting on His throne, just waiting for us to be free of the bondage, tapping His fingers in anticipation, because from the moment we did that, we've been on a roller coaster of adventure!

As I look back over the last several months, I can now see the quickening in my Spirit whenever I saw little black children out and about. Stories of African refugees and orphanages began filling up my path. A visiting orphanage director at my Grandmother's Retirement Home, a program on tv, an email, a happened upon blog or two. . . And the funny thing was, whenever I mentioned these things to Jason he didn't freak out or shoot down the discussions, knowing full well where they were leading. . .

While I was down with a broken ankle in January a friend called and asked me to design a blog for her upcoming trip to Ghana. I looked through the pictures, prayed over the project, watched the video links, and felt a true passion to helping in any way I could. Then, on January 31, 2009 I sat in church, holding my adopted niece Adiah, and listening to a life changing sermon on the Holy Spirit Baptism, and my heart was beginning to call out for another child, or two. The Holy Spirit woke Jason up in the middle of the night and instructed him to go back and listen to the sermon as well (he had been on a date with our daughter Sat night) and so the next morning we went back to church to listen to the service again, and that's when I knew. I heard God call me Ghana, during a discussion of the Holy Spirit baptism of Abram and Sarai where God added His breath, the letter h, to their lives. For Sarai he removed the I, for Abram, duplicated the A, and for my name it went from Gina to Ghana. At first I took this as an instruction to go to Ghana to adopt, but after a lot of research and prayer, realized God was just opening my Spirit up to the idea of an African Adoption through that moment, and felt His call to Ethiopia.

A couple of days later I was having lunch with my sister in law and we were ready to leave the restaurant, when I just knew I was supposed to ask her, "So when are you adopting again?" She instantly began crying, shocked that I would ask, but the Holy Spirit had already told me beforehand we would do this together, but I was convinced she would never go through it again after the tiring transition she had experienced with Adiah and the move to Midlothian. (Both wonderful, amazing blessings, yet life changing nonetheless!)

As we talked about God's confirmations, and the doubts and fears we had both taken to Him on the subject, a strange peace just feel completely on me. I got in my car and I just begun telling Him I didn't know when was the right time, I knew He wanted me to impact the world through this, but I was concerned about our income, our small cars, our small house. . . and I just kept asking for a sign to know it was time to move. I turned on the radio, which I NEVER have on in the car, I'm a quiet freak when I'm alone, and the song was,

What Are You Waiting For

by Natalie Grant.

Sometimes I get that overwhelming feeling

So sad those faces on tv

If I tried to make a difference would it help anyway

But then I stop and to myself I say

So you wanna change the world

What are you waiting for

You say you're gonna start right now

What are you waiting for

It only takes once voice

So come on now and shout it out

Give a little more

What are you waiting for

Sometimes I feel a little helpless

Seems like I can't do a thing

But anything is possible just you wait and see

Good things happen if you just believe

Someday somehow

Gonna take that step

Cause time is ticking away

Right here right now

Before it's too late

Gonna face tomorrow today

I called Jason at work and let him know I would be looking into adoptions on the Internet when I got home, and he got excited with me. When I got home, Amy had already sent me several with information about Ghana and other African Nations.

But, Jason and I were nervous, this is a big deal to trust God to provide financially for the adoption, two cars, and a bigger house. We were still praying earnestly for an answer on Sunday morning. Every time I would try and open my mouth to sing during worship, the Holy Spirit would say, "Quiet!" and I would have to stop and I just stood there weeping and watching the most beautiful picture of Christ lifting me up toward heaven. It was a beautiful scene, a gift from my Father of confirmation that He would provide, lift, educate, and deliver. When the prayer call came at the close of the service, the side door opened and Arnita Taylor walked in the sanctuary to join the alter ministry team. It was my final confirmation. Arnita is one of those women I love dearly. I've been bible study sisters with her since I was pregnant with Nathan and I hadn't seen her in almost three years, we were both at a different church back then, and running into people at a church as large as ours isn't common. She's a beautiful African American woman, and I knew she was there to answer some of the questions I had about being capable of having a bi-racial family. It was a perfect God appointment.

The next morning Jason called me when I woke up and asked me when I was going to apply, and I got on the computer and did it. The entire time I kept arguing with God about finances, almost daring Him that He was going to have to come through, and I was now EXPECTING it with urgency. The next morning on Tuesday, Jason got a call from a prospective employer offering him a new position with an increase in salary this year equal to the cost of the adoption! Praise the LORD!

Just had a God moment while typing these memories out. . . went back to look up the words of Natalie Grant's song on the Internet to paste in here, and read the words for the first time! I didn't know it was even about a response to seeing faces on tv! I came in on it that day after the first couple of lines! How cool is that! What a GOD thing!